I've also looked into sending MMS without having to use the intent mechanism so there is no user interaction required. I didnt find anything ideal for this but did make a bit of progress with a prototype.
The following blog post along with the nokia code referenced there does the https POST and got some progress going. http://androidbridge.blogspot.com/2011/03/how-to-send-mms-programmatically-in.html. Also of some help was this SO post detailing a bit more about APNs and handling attachments: How to send image via MMS in Android?
I was able to get some basic MMS going with those but, I'm on Sprint and found that the way the code above filters APNS wasnt finding the Sprint APN that my phones have with a null type. I patched around that and had MMS with attachments working on Sprint.
Testing on Verizon yielded some more challenges. It seems Verizon uses an mms gateway http host that is only addressable when connected to the Verizon mobile network. When on wifi, you cant reach the host. I havent yet discovered how the built in MMS app deals with sending Verizon MMS when wifi is up.
So, bottom-line is I think your pretty deep into having to build your own service to handle this. There is no SDK support for MMS and I dont know of any opensource projects that handle it as of yet.