Like most people facing this problem, I'm a novice with these Microsoft IDEs (Interactive Development Environments), but I've successfully used C# Express 2010 to access and update a database created in SS 2008 R2 Express, so I'll share what I did.
I never could figure out how to use the Data Source Wizard to make it work, but it was easy to just type the connection string and make the value of Data Source=.\SQLEXPRESS
Then I was able to work with a database in both SS 2008E and C# Express 2010 on a single Windows Professional computer.
I found this tutorial helpful for getting started with datasets.
The tutorial avoided the challenge of connecting to a SS Express MDF from C# Express by creating its database from within C# Express; and, as of this writing, it is out-of-date on data connection screens (which I'm not certain can handle the problem anyway), but I thought it was a good intro to using C# to access and update SS data. If you use the tutorial, just build the table they suggest directly in SS Management Studio. Then ignore the steps for using the menus/wizards to create your connection string. Just type what they show in the code except make the Data Source = .\SQLEXPRESS