I heard a UDP payload of 508 bytes will be safe from fragments. I heard the real MTU is 1500 but people should use a payload of 1400 because headers will eat the rest of the bytes, I heard many packets will be fragmented so using around 64K is fine. But I want to forget about all of these and programmatically detect what's gets me good latency and throughput from my local machine to my server.
I was thinking about implementing something like a sliding window that TCP has. I'll send a few UDP packets then more and more until packets are lost. I'm not exactly sure how to tell if a packet was delayed VS lost and I'm not sure how to slide by down without going to far back. Is there an algorithm typically used for this? If I know the average hop between my machine and server or the average ping is there a way to estimate the maximum delay time of a packet?