Possible Duplicate:
VisualVM over ssh
I'm writing this question and answering it because I spent a few hours getting this to work today and no answer I found on here worked for me. Hopefully this is helpful for others. If you have another solution than the one I ended up using, please feel free to answer the question as well. If yours is better I'll accept yours instead.
The problem: I'm trying to monitor some home made java applications on my FreeBSD server (this should apply to Linux servers as well) using VisualVM and jstatd, but I can't get VisualVM to list the processes on the server even after I forwarded the assigned and random jstatd ports in my firewall and can see a connection being made using sockstat.