I want to turn cascade on by default. How can I do that in MySQL?
Preferably I'd like to edit my.cnf
You can't turn it on by default.
You'll have to set it as a foreign key constraint on a key-by-key basis. See the documentation at http://dev.mysql.com/doc/refman/5.5/en/innodb-foreign-key-constraints.html
The cascade on delete behavior is controlled when the individual foreign key constraints are created. There is no global setting for this.