13 Easy Ways to Flirt with Your Husband

Co-authored by Lena Dicken, Psy.D and Donna Sarkar

Last Updated: August 16, 2022 References

Are you looking to spice up married life? Do you miss the spark from your relationship’s honeymoon stage? When you’re together for a long time, it can be hard to keep things exciting. This is why flirting with your husband can keep the romance and thrill alive.^{[1]
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Research source} We’ve put together a list of ways that you can flirt with your husband to rekindle your love. Keep reading to find out how you can get butterflies in your stomach all over again.

1

Be affectionate with your touch.

You can easily flirt with your partner by showing affection through kissing, hugging, or holding hands. Physical affection can also help you bond, relieve stress, and feel closer to each other.^{[2]
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Research source} Here are a few ways to flirt through touch:
- Snuggle close to him while watching TV or laying in bed.
- Lightly caress his legs under the table at dinner.
- Massage his shoulders when he’s sitting down after a long day at work.
- Steal a kiss when he’s least expecting it to surprise him.
- If you're insecure about touching, it might just be as simple as saying, “I'd like to have more affection in our relationship” to alert your husband of what you'd like to do.

2

Wear something he likes.

Grab his attention by wearing a top with an eye-catching neckline or a sexy dress.^{[3]
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Research source} This will help you look your best, and feel it too, which is essential for successful flirting! Plus, your husband will appreciate the extra effort you put into looking good for him.
- You can also experiment with a new hairstyle or make-up look. Your husband will be surprised to see you shake things up and can compliment you on your new style.
- Put on his favorite perfume. To attract your man, try a vanilla-scented perfume for a warm and spicy mist of confidence.^{[4]
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3

Show him you're flirting with your body language.

You can say a great deal with just a coy smile and good eye contact. ^{[5]
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Research source} Here are a few ways to use body language to flirt:
- Flip your hair. A flirty action like twirling your locks will send your husband the message that you’re flirting with him.
- Don’t cross your arms. This makes you look more reserved and unapproachable. Try to ease up and relax to seem more inviting to your husband.
- Try changing your tone of voice to flirt. For example, whisper in his ears to make whatever you're saying more intimate and special.

4

Compliment him.

A genuine and flirty compliment can leave him smiling from ear to ear for the rest of the day. Here are a few compliments to make him blush:
- “I could get lost in your eyes.”
- “Your new haircut makes you look even more handsome.”
- “You have an amazing sense of style.”
- “You always know how to make me smile.”

5

Send him a flirty text.

A flirty text will get your husband thinking about you when you’re apart. Plus, they can be a great way to encourage intimacy and express how much you miss your husband. If you’re stumped on what to text him, here are a few ideas:^{[6]
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- “Would love to have a massage from you right now.”
- “Guess what I’m wearing on our next date?😉”
- “Have I told you how much I enjoy getting lost in your eyes?”

6

Transform your bedroom into a romantic escape.

Show your man that you want to have fun by setting the mood in the bedroom with music and mood lighting. This romantic display can also be a chance to make your flirty intentions known. Start by:
- Playing a romantic song that reminds you of him. Jazz and classical music are great options to create a passionate ambiance.^{[7]
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- Using string lights to create mood lighting. Opt for light bulbs with a red or orange hue to create a warm and romantic setting.^{[8]
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7

Make his favorite meal.

The way to a man’s heart is his stomach. Flirt with your husband by cooking his favorite dish or ordering from his favorite restaurant. This will make him feel loved and cared for. Below are some dishes that your man might love:^{[9]
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- Steak and potatoes will make his mouth water. This is a great dish to make on your anniversary or for a special event.
- Chili is a classic that guys enjoy. Ask him what he enjoys in his chili and then add it to the mix for a tasty dish.
- Pizza is an undeniable favorite for many guys. Order his slices to make him feel special.
- Make chocolate chip cookies for a sweet dessert to end the night.

8

Plan a date night.

Keep things fun and flirty by asking your husband on a date. This can create a flirty atmosphere and serve as the perfect opportunity to spend some time together.^{[10]
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Research source} The date also doesn’t have to be extravagant to make him feel special. Plan the perfect date by incorporating what your husband loves to do. You can try:
- Have a movie night with his favorite movies. Just cozy up with some popcorn and enjoy his favorite films for a fun evening.
- Go stargazing together for a romantic date. You can lie under the stars and try to spot the constellations.
- Plan a romantic picnic with his favorite foods. A picnic date can be an adventurous setting to enjoy each other’s company and have some fun under the sun.

9

Bring him a gift.

Make your guy feel appreciated with a thoughtful gift. Think about something your man really needs or is dying to buy. The right gift can make your husband feel understood and loved.^{[11]
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Research source} Here a things you could get him:
- A photo album of your adventures together.
- The new shoes that he’s been eyeing.
- A cologne that you find attractive.
- A hammock to enjoy the outdoors. A two-person hammock is great for the two of you to cuddle and relax in together.^{[12]
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10

Talk him up in public.

Rave about your man in front of his friends and family to make him feel special. For example, you can bring to attention his new promotion or achievement at work or rave about his cooking skills.
- Be sure to express how proud you are of your man and highlight his talents.

11

Write him a love letter.

Get your man thinking about you all day with a flirty note on his laptop or packed with his lunch. When was the last time you wrote your husband a love letter?^{[13]
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Research source} Let your feelings inspire you and write him a note filled with how much you love him.
- Start the letter with a term of endearment to add romance like, “To my heart” or “Dear handsome.”
- Use beautiful stationery for a romantic touch. This will make your letter look extra special.
- Make him swoon with a love poem. You can express how he makes you feel or things you love about him in the poem.

12

Take interest in his hobbies.

Guys love it when their partners show a genuine interest in their passions.^{[14]
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Research source} To make your man happy, suggest doing his favorite activity together. For example, if he loves to hike, plan a hike that the two of you can enjoy together. If he loves to play video games, see if you can play a game with him.
- The next time your man shows interest in an activity, jot it down so that you can remember the things he likes to do for fun.

13

Relive your memories of falling in love.

Remind him of the good old days and all the fun you used to have with each other. Taking a trip down memory lane can be extremely romantic and help you experience the spark all over again.^{[15]
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Research source} You can do this by:
- Looking at old photos or notes to each other. This is a great way to turn back the clock and make your way through the years of flirting and getting to know one another.
- Visit a memorable spot like where you shared your first kiss or had your first date. This activity is bound to bring up some sweet memories and remind you of the moments when you were falling in love.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do married couples flirt?

Lena Dicken, Psy.D
Clinical Psychologist
Dr. Lena Dicken is a Clinical Psychologist based in Santa Monica, California. With over eight years of experience, Dr. Dicken specializes in therapy for anxiety, depression, life transitions, and relationship difficulties. She utilizes an integrative approach combining Psychodynamic, Cognitive Behavioral, and Mindfulness-based therapies. Dr. Dicken holds a BS in Integrative Medicine from the University of Hawaii at Manoa, an MA in Counseling Psychology from Argosy University Los Angeles, and a Doctor of Psychology (Psy.D) in Clinical Psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology at Westwood. Dr. Dicken’s work has been featured in GOOP, The Chalkboard Magazine, and in numerous other articles and podcasts. She is a licensed psychologist with the state of California.

Lena Dicken, Psy.D

Clinical Psychologist

Expert Answer

I believe every couple has to navigate how they feel about the level of affection to figure out how to flirt on their specific case. Some people are very touchy feely, while others are simply not. Having a conversation around understanding what makes somebody feel good in a relationship can be very helpful in terms of just bridging that gap of understanding what needs to happen for both parties to sort of feel good.